My Personal Little Land Shark...

Almost from the moment we found out you were going to be a boy, your mother and I decided that Noah and Oliver were the front runners to your name.  Now, many names have come and gone from that list since then, but those two always seemed to resonate with us.  Through the wonder that is the Interweb, we were able to research almost anything to do with any name anyone has ever been called, including Oliver and Noah.  Come to find out that "Noah", in addition to being some guy who allegedly built a carnival cruise line for animals, is also Australian slang for "shark."  Now, as you may have already come to find out, I have a slight obsession with sharks, so once I found out that your name is another term for "shark," it instantly became my top pick.  Before you freak out thinking that I named you after a fish, we did like the name long before I found learned this little kernel of useless trivia.

So, since we decided to name you Noah, I have always thought of you as my little land shark, and ironically enough, things keep popping up that just make that nickname really stick for me.  Here are some examples...

1) You kind of have this "fish-out-of water" thing going on when you are laying on your stomach.  I know  that you are a baby, and you haven't developed any muscles to walk, crawl, or even hold your own head up for an extended period of time, but that shouldn't change the fact that you do kind look like a fish flopping around on the bottom of a boat every once in a while.

2) Are you familiar with "Tonic", not the mixer for gin, but the natural state of paralysis sharks can experience when flipped upside down?  Let's assume, for the sake of this blog, that you aren't.  No matter how agitated or restless sharks can become, they can be flipped upside down (in the water) and they will enter a state of natural paralysis.  How does this relate to you?  Over the past week or so, you have become a bit more cranky from time to time.  And by cranky, I mean that you scream at the top of your lungs until your face is red and you are out of breath.  Like blood curdling screams of horror that make your mom and I think that someone is tearing your tiny fingernails out one at a time and pouring hot sauce in the open wounds!  I am getting to the point, so just keep reading... 

Last week, your mom made me rent and watch The Happiest Baby on the Block, which is a documentary about how to calm down a fussy baby.  Like most of the baby shows your mom tries to make me watch (thanks TLC), I immediately assumed that the advice of this doctor was probably rubbish, and I would likely  just continue to try my own (ineffective) way of calming you when you get in one of your "moods".  Basically, a pediatrician named Dr. Karp has a system that should calm down any screaming or colicky (sp?) baby.  I begrudgingly watched this documentary, more to score brownie points with your mom than thinking I would really find any pertinent information for how to raise a child.

I watched in amazement as this doctor took violently screaming babies, wrapped them tightly in blankets, turned them on their side, bounced them up and down, and shhh'd in their ears, all until the stopped crying.  I mean, this guy was like the baby whisperer!  Over and over, he would pick up crying babies and turn them into quiet and calm (i.e. ideal) babies just like David Friggin Copperfield OR just like putting sharks into tonic.

So here we are today, and I have almost perfected the ability to put you into tonic!  Swaddle tight, on your side, bounce the knees, shhh in the ear...    ...and BOOM, quiet and calm Noah!!!!!  So, to sum up the last few paragraphs, I have figured out that there is a way to naturally paralyze you into calmness, IT WORKS, and I intend to use it as often as possible (please don't judge me, it was recommended by a REAL pediatrician)

3) When you get hungry, anything close to your mouth is likely going to get bitten.  Shirts, blankets, hands, fingers, hair, arms, knuckles...  Basically, anything close to your mouth when you are hungry is going to get attacked, just like sharks! 

So there you have it.  Just three reasons why I think of you as my little land shark.  You have been pretty cranky this week, and while I have gotten the hang of the whole baby whisperer thing, it is still a bit foreign to your mom.

Also, we had another doctor's appointment this week, and you are already 9 lbs 8 oz. and still growing like a champ.  Doc thinks you are going to be a monster (offensive lineman?  next Bobby Jenks?)!  I asked him to make a sling for you that will keep your right hand tied behind your back (better chance of becoming a left handed reliever or quarterback), and he said no!  Looks like I will have to keep my original plan of using duct tape!

Till the next time...

Dad

 

Labor Day and Anniversaries...

Although there is plenty to talk about this week, I just wanted to take the time to wish your mother a Happy 1st Anniversary!!!!  Once you get older, you will likely say, "Why do I care about your anniversary, I wasn't even there when you got married," but in this case, without the events of one-year ago today, you would surely not be here today!  So no matter how many siblings you end up having, YOU should be the one child that goes out of his way to wish us a Happy Anniversary every September 6th!

Back to you and everything we learned this week...

What a fantastic weekend!  Aunt Amy, Uncle Mark, and your cousins Allie and Ryan came in from Atlanta to meet you.  While it was nice to introduce you to them, this was also the weekend we introduced you to the rest of the world.  We broke in the stroller this weekend and decided you were old enough, and mature enough, to handle the outside world.  You had many firsts this weekend, we took you to Portillos, Pepe's, Baby's-R-Us, Target, McCullom Park, as well as both sets of Grandparent's homes AND on of your Great-Grandparent's home.  You met two aunts, three uncles, two cousins, a great-uncle, a second cousin, two psuedo cousins, a great grandpa, a great grandma, the Zvoneks, and the Ohdes.  Non-stop action all weekend, and I don't think I will ever stop beaming with pride when I introduce you to new people.

So Saturday morning we met with our second photographer.  We have been blessed with a couple of budding photographers as friends, who were more than willing to photograph you as a newborn.  We first sat down with JR Photography (Jeff Lintz) last Saturday (The pics in this post are courtesy of him).  This Saturday we met with Sarah Plourd-Jastre (samples of her pics will be available later this week).  So one of the primary differences between these two photographers, was that Sarah wanted to take some pics with you "au natural".  We were expecting you to have finished eating, and fallen into a DEEP milk coma, but, of course, that just wasn't the case.  You were wide awake through the entire shoot!

  

After about an hour with Sarah by ourselves, Aunt Amy came by  with Grandma T and your cousins Allie and Ryan.  You had just finished one of your "au natural" poses, and you were starting to get a little fussy.  Now, handling a 10-day-old child sans diaper, as you can imagine, is a bit like playing Russian roulette.   You started to get a little fussy, and Grandma T felt like she knew how to calm you down.  She proceeded to pick up the loaded pistol (that would be you!).  Grandma swooped you off the blanket and began to coddle you like only a grandma can.  Aunt Amy made sure to comment about how funny it would be if you peed on grandma, and sure enough, about 3.8 seconds later, you proceeded to piss all over your grandmother!  Grandma, to her credit, took it like a champ and we all had a pretty good laugh.  

Life Lesson #1 - Pissing on other people is MUCH more entertaining that pissing on oneself (you must be preparing for a life in politics)!

We spent a lot of time with your Aunt and cousins this weekend, and it was great to see them interact with you.  They were so excited to meet you this weekend, and they were more than willing to lend helping hands, as long as it didn't mean changing a diaper.  I hope the fact that they live in Atlanta doesn't deter you from becoming close to them, but knowing my sister (your Aunt), she will do anything possible to make sure we get quality family time a few times a year.  Between their visits to Chicago, our visits to Atlanta,  a little bit of Skype, and a few family vacations sprinkled in, I don't think you and your cousins will have a problem hitting it off!  Worst part is, this is only ONE set of cousins.  While Atlanta makes visits more manageable, you have another set of cousins that live in Sweden.  That will be an entirely different hurdle to overcome!

All in all, this weekend was really the perfect way to introduce you to the world.  Good food, good family, good weather, and good (well-behaved) baby made for a perfect weekend.  We are now a lot more comfortable taking you outside of our cave.  Not sure if we are supposed to be taking you all over the place with us, but our condo is SO small, that cabin fever sets in pretty fast.  It is best for everyone's sanity if we get out once in a while.  

Oh, and by the way, I am working on our current living situation.  There are some life changing events in the works right now and I will update you once more things are finalized, but it will definitely impact where will may be living 6 to 9 months from now. 

Till the next time...

Dad 

To anyone reading this, feel free to contact me to inquire about any photos you see in my blog.  Our friends have been kind enough to help document Noah's early days, so if you like what you see, I would be glad to put you in touch with our photographers.

Potty Trained After 7 Days...

Well, one week down and approximately 987 weeks more until we send you off to college.  Time sure flies!!

I have been back at work all week, and I must say, I would much rather be at home with you and mom.  You have been pretty well behaved all week, but for some reason, you were really fussy all night last night.  I hope that is a one-off occurrence, but I have a feeling that we will have plenty more nights like this over time.

We still can't quite get the hang of this diaper thing.  While neither your mom or I have a problem getting you changed, it appears that some of the diapers we have been using don't do a good job of keeping all of your pee in the diaper.  I mean, god forbid a diaper actually be able to perform the ONE task it is meant to perform.  Oh, and while I am on the subject, you totally peed in your own face yesterday!  I had the towel down covering your bits, but evidently you felt the need to remove the towel so that you had a clear shot.  I found it quite hilarious.  You, however, were not amused once the pee hit your face...

Your ability to time your urination so that it happens exactly 3 seconds after your diaper is removed is uncanny.  With that kind of self control, you should already be potty trained!  So in an effort to counteract your ability to piss all over everything in a 3 foot radius from you, I came up with a brilliant plan.  I went out and bought multiple packages of puppy pads...

In theory, this should be the perfect counteraction to your pension for pissing all over everything.  Your mother, while extremely amused by my sudden flash of brilliance, was not so enthusiastic about my solution.  Apparently puppy pads have all kinds of chemicals in them to make dogs want to pee on them.  Ergo, no puppy pads for newborn babies...

All in all, it has been an eventful first week.  With you, we are officially a family.  With all of the setbacks we have had over the past few years, every facet of our lives seems to be just a little bit brighter now that you are here.  Good things are happening for our family, and you seem to be the catalyst that is bringing it all to the forefront!

Till the next time...

Dad

On The 7th Day, We Rested...

Here I sit, back at work a mere 6 days after your arrival. I have been away from you for almost 2 hours, and I don't think I will be able to make it through the rest of my day!

Everything has been going well since we brought you home on Friday. You have been pretty well behaved, save for diaper changing, which you absolutely abhor! Most of your day is spent sleeping, eating, or pooping, all of which you really seem to have taken a liking to. In the few hours that you are awake, you seem to stare off into space. I know that you can't really see anything outside of 8-10 inches right now, but you do have a tendency to go a bit cross-eyed as you try to focus on mine or your mom's face (one of the many things we already find endearing about you).

I have been able to get a little sleep over the past week, but you seem to be draining the energy from mom. Although you are typically on a 3 hour cycle (1 hour eating and 2 hours sleeping), mom is finding it hard to close her eyes to rest in the downtime. She says it is because you are too cute to stop staring at...

You met your pediatrician yesterday, and your progress reports are all stellar. You are still a few ounces under your birth weight, but doc said that most newborns don't return to their birth weight for a couple weeks. You are on track to hit that mark in about 8 or 9 days.

It has been a whirlwind week for our family, all in thanks to your early arrival last Tuesday. It is a bit scary to know that you are already a week old. Everyone keeps telling me to enjoy these days with you, because I will never get them back. I am starting to realize that you are going to grow up in the blink of an eye, and I don't want to miss a single moment of it! I will see you tonight at 6:08pm, and I am already counting the minutes...

Till the next time...

Dad

Day 2...

I don't even know where to start. I had no idea how I would react once you were actually a tangible person lying in front of me. I mean, I didn't think I would harbour any ill will toward you, but I wasn't sure how I would handle this new responsibility thrust upon me. Turns out I have, what some people consider to be, a knack for taking care of you! Diapers, swaddling, soothing, cleaning fresh wounds (circumcision is not a petty sight), etc. About the only thing I am not responsible for is feeding you, since your mom has cornered the family market on milk producing mammories!!

Lots of friends and family have already stopped by to see you, including your Great Grandpa Kula. There are many people that will influence your life as you grow up, but I fear his health will not hold up long enough to be one of them. Why do I bring up such a sensitive topic right now? Because I wanted to point out, that although his time in your life is likely more limited than ANY other family member, the smile on his face when he got to hold you was BY FAR the largest of anyone that has had the pleasure!

Its little moments like the one above that let me know how special you are to us. You have been in this world for all of 47.5 hours as I type this, but you have already left an indelible mark on everyone you have been around. Relatively easy for almost any baby to do, yet, as your father, I am inclined to tell you that you do it better than anyone else has ever done it!! Your progress really has been above average since yesterday morning (this is according to a objective third-party nurse opinion). You have already taken to the boob, which has a tendency to settle you down if you do get a bit cranky because you're hungry.

I am learing more about you every day; a topic that I look forward to exploring more as you get older. You come home from the hospital tomorrow, and the real journey will begin. No more nurses and no more doctors; it will be just me, you, and your mom. This is when things get interesting...

Till the next time...

Dad

August 25th 12:28am...

What a crazy night! You finally came out of hiding at 12:28am this morning. Mom went into labor at about 5:30pm on the 24th. About 7 hours later, you came out with a full cone head of hair at 8 lbs 9 oz and 21.5 inches long. I have to admit, you really looked like an alien when you first came out, but knowing that you were our little alien made you the cutest alien I had ever seen!

I had just sat down on the train for my daily 35 minute commute to Shangri-Lisle when I got a call from mom (I always assumed I would get a frantic call from your mom, freaking out about being in labor, but when push came to shove, she was pretty calm and subdued.). So your mom proceeds to tell me that her water broke, and she was wondering if I could "hurry home!!!!" Now, I have taken public transportation to work for the better part of two years and the term "hurry home" is no where in my vocabulary!

One train ride and one cab ride later, I made it home to find you mom calmly doing her hair before she went into labor (mom must have wanted to look her best for you). Her contractions didn't really start until about 6:10, but once they started HOLY COW!!! We left the house at 6:30 for the hospital, and contractions were only 2 minutes apart and almost a minute in duration. I seriously thought I was going to have to deliver you myself on the side of Butterfield Road! We made it to the hospital around 6:50 and went right into the delivery room. Contractions were still coming pretty hard and fast, but mom's epidural started to kick in around 8:30, so things settled down for a bit.

After a couple hours of "relaxing" (if you can call intense contractions masked by a nerve inhibitor relaxing), mom was ready to start pushing. Not so much becuase you were ready to come out, but because it actually made her feel better to push during her contractions. At this point, it was just your mom, me, Grandma Mueller, and one nurse. For the next hour and a half or so, the four of us coached mom through every contraction. By midnight, more people started to come into the room, which let me know that you must have been getting close! 28 minutes, 1 doctor, 4 more nurses, and a few contractions later, you graced us with your presence.

So that is our story to this point! Since you have come out, you have only had a few bursts of crying, but for the most part, you have been really well behaved. As I sit here typing this post, you are peacefully sleeping next to me (see below). I can't believe how perfect you turned out to be. Sure, that is easy to say now. I am sure in about 10 or 15 years I will be rethinking that last comment, but for now I just want to revel in your perfectness!

Noah James Thompson

August 25th, 2010

Till the next time...

Dad

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are...

No changes or updates to announce. However, the debate over your name is starting to get interesting. For the last 6 months, we have had just a few names that we both liked, and the conversation never really varied from that group. Well, recently, we have started to throw more names out that we like, so the act of naming you has become a bit murky. The good news is that we both agree on everything we like, so there won't be an animosity towards picking one name over the other. I wish we could just ask you what you prefer. That way, in your awkward teenage years, you wouldn't be pissed at us for choosing for you!

On a lighter note, according to various websites, you are "fully cooked" and ready to come any day (Gee, thanks for the heads up...). This is what you may look like right now. I should point out, this is the "3D" version of what you are supposed to look like right now. Want to see the 2D version?

40 weeks in "2D"...


Seriously? Although I am sure that some babies may come out looking like this, this picture is absolutely ridiculous. I have always stood by my opinion that new born babies, in general, look like aliens, and this only supports my point. It looks like some website just hired a bunch of 3rd graders to draw their rendition of their younger siblings!! I hope you look more like the former, as opposed to the latter...

Other than that, we are still just waiting anxiously. Mom is still walking every day, with the hope that all of her moving around will coax you out of your hiding place. Obviously, that isn't working.

Till the next time...

Dad